KISAH KEMBARA PERANTAUAN (New life 2001)

Jadi I am now married.

Dapat anak immediately ..3boys. Maka bermulalah episod to deal with 3boys anak orang putih  dan how to say…mak mak mereka yg berhati kering ?


Hidup sgt mencabar..and I was young… 26yrs old. Didnt speak french and didnt understand a word. Mmg totally rely on my husband for everything. It was like a new world. Dont know to call it full of excitement…not really..coz I had to handle non stop problems with anak tiri dan mak mereka yg senantiasa tak puas hati dan cari pasal.


Tak perlu cerita secara detail. My honest advise buat adik adik sana…pls kalau boleh avoid kawin dgn duda yg ada anak ni, tolong lah avoid. Why ? Let me give you some points

·         Bkn mudah besarkan anak orang TERUTAMANYA yg mak dia masih hidup. Most case, you will live like living in hell

·         Even kalau mak dah takde…next problem, ditegur anak orang, bapaknya sentap. Dan anak orang ni ssh nak dgr cakap and akan keluar dari mulut…you are not my mother

·         Bila dah ada anak sendiri, suami tak heran nak bawak pegi taman permainan atau park sbb dia dah bosan disebabkan dah pernah pegi dgn anak anak dia sebelum ni..in my case Disneyland. Daku bawak anak daku sendiri ya, bapaknya mmg takkan pegi. 

Menjaga anak orang putih, yg maknya mengajar benda² tak elok to do against me…it was tough. No matter how nice you are, sentiasa cari point to disrespect me…at one point terfikir…ada masalah mental agaknya sbb orang waras tak mcm ni…it isnt my fault their relationship didnt work.. I wasnt the 3rd party so what is your problem ?

Basically we never had real time for honeymoon only two of us. Him with his guiltiness takut anak² rasa terpinggir. Me I had to wake up every night sbb ada yg melalak nak mak dia tgh malam. Anak sorang yg duduk dekat, mak dia make sure anak dia tiap tiap hari with us. Balik umah utk tido sahaja. Kamilah tukang ambik balik sekolah, hantar pegi extra class, daku lar tukang masak, kemas, membasuh dsb. At one point, mak mentua ku cakap..tau tak mak dia hari rabu dan weekend tak keja?

Memula daku tak faham apa maksud dia.. lama lepas tu baru realise mesej yg nak disampaikan..setiap hari even weekend pun anak dia datang umah, makan, tido..we didnt have time alone without being bothered.

I was like a nanny..taking care of them..cook for them..while my husband is away for work..at times outstation. Never once a word of thankyou dari mak mereka..never. Tu belum lagi pe el anak anak tiri especially yg tua ni..no manners..once belakang bapak dia, dia keluarkan what was in his mouth, telling me what I cook is disgusting...without his father knowledge. If a boy did that to me now, I would have given him one slap...but I was naive at that time.

So we are married. I came to this country with not much money with..almost nothing. My husband didnt want people to know we are married…risau orang kata daku ni kawin dgn dia semata mata sbb nak duduk sini…do you know how it feels when your husband telling you this ? As if you came from 3rd world war poor country..you never work your whole life. The first question my MIL asked me « do you have a bank card ? » to be sure that daku ni tak depend kat anak dia financially lar mcm tu. I was so naive at that time.

Whatever orang cakap, daku tak bantah. Diam dan senyum sahaja out of respect for them…though inside me is struggling between homesick and my new life.

First years of marriage, we fight a lot…and many times I threaten to leave him in which I never have the courage to do so (I wish I had that courage and change my destiny).

To be continued.

#journalkembaralightkm